you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Randomize
