I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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