More tranny stories later!
do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
