East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
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