Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
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