Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
