no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
Randomize
