Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
