I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Randomize
