I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
