Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
