i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
