ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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