STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
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