I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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