Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
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