That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
Randomize
