Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
What's dad's email?
[email protected]
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
