just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Randomize
