Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Randomize
