ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
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