Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
So, my ex just showed me the drunk voicemail we left him last night. Started out with me saying "I think it's Shane." Then you took my phone and started singing a song about peanut butter, train tracks, and tequila. I joined in. On the upside, he said he's totally fine with being on the drunk dial list from now on. Soooo, another tequila night??
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
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