I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
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