question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
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