Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
Michael Bay diarrhea
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
Just high enough for therapy.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
