Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
Randomize
