Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize
