So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
We're too hungover to prance.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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