is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
Randomize
