my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
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