Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
I don't want my vagina anymore.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
Randomize
