Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
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