remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Randomize
