i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
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