Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Randomize
