So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
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