I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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