We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
Randomize
