good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Randomize
