found the other keg... it's in the tree
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
