you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
