I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
Randomize
