Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
Randomize
