I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize