Kiss
Puke
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
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