I hate all girls vehemently.
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
this hospital has no fireball
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Randomize
