Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
Randomize
