It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
