apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
oh god was she eating orange peels again
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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