Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
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